Tuesday, December 13, 2011


Sing it with me - 

On the fifth day of Christmas, Amazon France gave to me,
Beaucoup de soucis.

Two orders placed with two different Amazons (France & US), two problems encountered, two very different customer service experiences...

Amazon US customer service exchange:
La Mom : Hi, I’m calling from France because I just realized I sent a package to an incorrect address in Florida. It’s order #123456789.

Amazon US : No problem ! I can help you with that ! Yep, I see here the order came back full circle and is at our warehouse. I can send out a new one today, if you have the new address.

La Mom : Great. The address is blah blah blah blah.

Amazon US : Can I help you with anything else ?

La Mom : No, thank you so much.

Amazon France customer service exchange:
La Mom : Bonjour, a package I ordered has not shown up at it's delivery address. It was sent to my in-law’s home in Aix-en-Provence. Order numéro 123456789.

Amazon France : Are you sure you gave us the right address ? It’s 211 Rue Le Bon ?

La Mom : Oui.  

Amazon FR : You’re sure that’s the right address ?

La Mom : Yes. Your site says the package was delivered December 3rd, today is the 10th, and there’s still no package at my in-law’s house.

Amazon FR : Baaa, baaa, have your in-laws checked with the neighbors to see if the package was delivered to them by accident ?

La Mom : No.

Amazon FR : They need to check with their neighbors.

La Mom : Pardonnez-moi? Amazon can’t locate a package full of Christmas presents for my kids, so it’s up to my in-laws to go ask their neighbors if they’ve received it ?

Amazon FR : Oui.

(La Mom visualizes the scene)

La Mom :  Are you kidding ? My in-laws are old and one walks with a cane. There’s no way I’m going to tell two 80 year olds they have to check with their neighbors for a box full of presents. They don’t even know all of their neighbors. Franchement. 

Amazon FR : The package was delivered. It’s up to them to find it.

La Mom : Do you have someone’s signature indicating the package was received ? Because if you don’t, then it wasn’t. It’s your job to find it.

Amazon FR : Non, pas de signature, but the shipping records indicate the package was delivered.

La Mom : It wasn’t, so you need to ship a new one asap. Please.

Amazon FR : Désolée, c’est impossible.

(Sidebar : Whoa, wait. Wasn’t it France's great emperor Napoléan who coined the proverb, 
« Impossible n’est pas français » ? Yeah, right.)

La Mom : I’m a premium customer, doesn’t that count for anything ? Laissez-moi parler avec votre manager, s'il vous plaît.

Amazon FR : Un moment.


And the line was disconnected.

As one of my favorite ex-pat bloggers, David Lebovitz says, WTF.

WTF = Welcome To France

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