Monday, September 7, 2009

Dogged


France.

A country with a long history of promoting Les Droits de L'Homme (human rights.) Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité.

Yet even I was surprised to see human rights fly out the window when it comes to dogs. It seems dogs have more rights that children do. At least in the 16th arrondissement of Paris. Case in point:

The French Fries got a bucket of sidewalk chalk from the US over the summer. We put it to use last week on our street. My little Monet and Manet were having so much fun scribbling Eiffel Towers, cars, and les soleils (suns) when an older lady walked up and tried to put an end to it.

Madame: Excuse me, but you shouldn't let your kids draw on the sidewalk like that.

La Mom: Oh it's ok Madame. They're just crayons made for the sidewalk and will wash away the next time it rains.

Madame: Well it looks like graffiti.

La Mom: I'm sorry about that, but the crayons are made for children to use this way.

Madame: It's dirty and it brings down the standing of the street. We live in the 16th arrondissement after all.

La Mom: (insert Parisian shoulder shrug)

Madame: We're not dogs living in an HLM (public housing).

Did she say 'dogs'? Of course La Mom took the dog reference and ran with it!

La Mom: What would you prefer to do? Walk down the street and have to look at scribbles or dog poop? Scribbles don't stink and if you walk on the drawings, they won't ruin your shoes!

Madame: Dogs don't know any better, but you do and you shouldn't let your kids draw on the sidewalk.

La Mom: If you want to clean up the streets then start with dog owners. Dog merde is bringing down the standing of the 16th, not my kids!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Back to School Daze

Back to school
Back to books
Back to teachers’ dirty looks
‘Cause my accent’s lame
It’s such a shame
But don’t make my kid take the blame!


It’s la rentrée. Parisians slowly shuffle back to work and school after a long, lazy summer.

But according to his teacher, Big Fry brought back more than souvenirs from his vacation in the States. He also brought back – quelle horreur! – an American accent.

La Maitresse de Classe: Bonjour, Madame. Did you have a nice summer?

La Mom: Yes, it was great. We spent a lot of time in les Etats-Unis – it was really good for Big Fry’s English.

La Maitresse: Hmmm…I noticed his accent has – comment dire – deteriorated.

La Mom: Deteriorated? But he’s completely bilingual! He speaks both languages perfectly. He never mixes French and English up.

Big Fry: Bye, Maman. Don’t worry pour moi. Je suis big this year. Je passerai un good time at l’ecole!

Merde. It’s going to be a long school year.
 

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